Which flag do I put up today? Yellow, red, …white? No, never pulled the white one….yet. Ravaged with hormones in a physical war on my body and mind, I am at the mercy of my 3 daughters who seem to hold all the cards to my emotional stability. They are winning this war. 20 years ago came the first, 4 years later my double pack. I think I have been fair throughout the years, fair enough to tell them when they were old enough, that “Mommy is having a Mommy day”. That could mean a yellow flag, but could also mean a red. In short, the culprit is our god given blessing of menstruation.

Yellow flag days are days when we eat chocolate, STEAL our childrens chocolate, cry at puppies and kittens in commercials, see the beauty in our childrens pig stye rooms because those kids are “ours”. Tears, in a nutshell just plain old tears. Ouch…my breasts are tender.

Red flag days we cry at weight gain, our brain explodes with the dropping sound of a feather and we are passionately surfing google for home made childrens rooms exposives. There is no beauty….mirrors should be outlawed on these days. Rage, in a nutshell just plain old rage. I’m doubled over with cramps.

As we get older, we accumulate our flag days. No longer the two or three days a month we have become the master of. We have now been introduced to the back up militant of the menstrual war…Miss Peri. Miss Peri Menopause.

She is a tricky one and a very good one at her mission. Her strategy is not letting you know when she is at your back door. Sometimes she stays away for a month, then she will come and relentlessly hassle you for perhaps, lets say, 63 days or so keeping you flipping your flags sometimes on a minute basis for days on end. And then, she’ll leave, just disappear…for 16 days and come back yet again.

I am not sure who to feel more sorry for, me or my three Girls? After all, at least they can escape me and Miss Peri. Something I myself, have not yet magically mastered.